April

This is the best that I can do right now.  I have to settle into a new routine and figure out how to accomplish things except for between 8 to 4:30 everyday.  It has been a struggle, but I will adapt. 

This month is a blur.  A complete, utter blur. I really just want to throw some pictures from the last month on this page and let you all figure out what they mean.  Or, make up your own stories, I don't care.  But, deep down, I know that writing is good for me.  Infact, it goes in this order when it comes to what is good for me: 1. Writing 2. Exercise 3. Vitamins 4. Immunizations, etc. You get it. 

So, like I did 6 months ago when things were hectic and I found myself with very little time and even less inspirations, I give you a summary of the last month in one post. 

Enjoy. 

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We had a bad storm at the beginning and the end of this month.  At the beginning, the trees were bare and naked.  I ached very badly for Spring.  Branches were everywhere after the wind and rain was a little too rough.  I took one home and set it in water and it took 3 weeks to bloom.  Around the time that everything else started blooming. 

It seems silly now, compared to what the trees look like today. 

Trees of pink and white are everywhere.  Their shapes and colors have taken over our neighborhoods.  There is a constant quiet sprinkle of petals in the air.  Almost snowfall like. 

It's like God looks at the world and says, "It just needs a dusting of pink."  There is pink everywhere, and I really like pink. 

I really love how West Coast shells look with East Coast petals. 

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This actually happened in March, but I started my job. And, of course you knew that, but maybe you didn't know that I felt really guilty leaving the dog home by herself all day.  Okay, you probably knew that too, but you probably didn't know what I did the last day of unemployment. 

I vowed to take the dog and my camera with me wherever I went.  We didn't do anything special, but I was very present in the day, and that felt very good.

I took her to Petco and bought her a lot of new toys.  I did not leave her side that day.  I put in cuddle overtime.  I gave her lots of peanut butter. 

The guilt didn't decrease. 

We played outside, throwing balls and playing tug-a-war in the not quite green grass. 

That made me feel even worse. 

She's fine though.  I'm fine even. 

We adapt.

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We grilled a couple weeks ago.  It seems so long ago.  Like last Summer. But, it was only a couple of weeks ago.

My life is going by too fast. 


Anyways.  

Now, I have a confession. I made a promise not to grill or make a fire until Randy and Theresa came out.  And, I obviously grilled. 

But, who could resist grilled steak and shrimp.  Really, can you blame me?  

Translation: Will work for grilled steak and shrimp

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Last week, we celebrated my birthday by going to a ball game. It was relaxing. We had beer and great food.  The weather had a great baseball crisp to it. 

K did good. 



That was the day before my birthday too. We switched plans at the last minute due to predicted downpour. On the day of, we cuddled together at a swanky restaurant (well, swanky for Central PA). We shared a bottle of wine, Washington wine of course. It was one of those restaurants that have throw pillows everywhere. Very swanky.


I like being 26.  It suits me.  It feels like its an appropriate age for me.  25 was a tough year personally.  There was a lot of turmoil and a lot of tough decisions had to be made. But, I survived and I feel like I emerged triumphant.

Infact, I feel like I've bloomed.  I know that's cliche, but Ive been wondering since I planted those bulbs in November just what exactly I'd be facing this Spring.

And, I've come to the conclusion that I got exactly what I wanted.  I am happy.  I am healthy.  I am tired, but it's a good tired.  A successful tired.  I feel like I planted the seeds and I nurtured the soil, and this crazy wildflower life sprouted up. 

Sometimes, we don't know what's coming.  Sometimes we have to plan for whatever may be. Sometimes we have to just let go and give it up. 

But, sometimes, we feel like something good is about to happen.  It's a very quiet, subtle feeling that is often missed.  All this time, I've been panicking and worrying about what could happen. Will I find a job? Will I get in shape for the wedding?  Will I prepare for my future? 

I panicked, but there was this little voice too.  It said, "Something great is going to happen."  I ignored it mostly, but it was still there. 

April was a blur.  I am tired.

But, it is a good, happy exhaustion.